OctPoWriMo 2018: Day 31: What It Is

Copyright Linnaea Mallette

Love is an endless

Eternal infinity

Sharing our sorrow

Some patches of happiness

In our purgatory; life

~Cie~

OctPoWriMo 2018: Day 30: Shrouded

Copyright Lassaffa

So everyone dances

Swinging along the moon

Singing their joyful tune

Swaying to the rhythm

Sweethearts are so in love

Standing in the shadows

Shrouded figures grieving

~Cie~

OctPoWriMo 2018: Day 29: Three of Swords

At the Beginning of the End Version 6

Photoshop Manipulation by The Real Cie

In unity were we well met

But that was before

My soul was crushed by the duality

Of everything and nothingness

When my soul was still filled with belief

In things spiritual and mystical

Now nothing is left but pain and sadness

Within this empty human life

You were perfection

I was lucky to find you

In a life full of suffering

You were a gift of great auspiciousness

I was destroyed when I lost you

And now all I have

Is loneliness

And nothingness

Eternally

Ondina Rvaga

Regent, Lost Zecor

Notes for Nerds: 

This is one of the story poems for Team Netherworld's WIP, Fetch.

The story, at its core, is Cthulhu Mythos fan fiction combined with elements from an original Star Trek episode (The Lights of Zetar) which gave me nightmares from the time I first saw it at the age of ten years old. 

Ondina Rvaga is a reluctant princess of Western Zecor on the planet Zetar 6. She spends her time working in a laboratory, using her empathic gifts to heal the victims of her violent and sadistic brother King Qweh if she can, compassionately dispatching them to the realm of spirit if she cannot. 

The people of West Zecor love the Princess Ondina and know her to be kind, but they also realize that she does not have much power to help them. Her brother is extremely powerful and controls the armies of West Zecor. Brutal soldiers happily do his bidding. 

Ondina is miserable in her existence. She does not expect to find love. She had been expected to marry her twenty-four-year-old half-brother, Prince Qweh, when she was twelve years old. She was resigned to her fate, believing herself blessed until she discovered Qweh's true, brutal nature. At that point, she used her healing gifts in reverse and destroyed her reproductive organs so she could never conceive an heir for the corrupt regime. 

Qweh knew that Ondina loved her people and couldn't bear to see them in pain. Over the years, he reveled in watching her suffer as she attempted to heal those devastated by the brutal attacks of his armies.

After Qweh groped her during a scouting mission, Ondina attempted to commit suicide by jumping from a precipice. She was encouraged by the spirit of Serab's twin brother Joub to repair her injuries. He promised her that someone who would bring the love that she could never have imagined was about to enter her life.

Days later, Serab was apprehended by King Qweh's lackeys and brought to Ondina as a joke. The king laughingly postulated that the tiny Serab, who stood approximately five feet three inches tall, replace Ondina's previous bodyguard, who had been slain by Qweh in a fit of rage. Ondina, however, did not see the suggestion as a joke. She claimed Serab as her bodyguard and assistant and treated him with a compassion which he had not thought possible from a member of West Zecor's wicked royal family.

Serab and Ondina were smitten with each other from the start but initially attempted to keep their feelings in check.

When the ill-advised sorcery of King Qweh under the direction of Yadira, High Priestess of Nyarlathotep, caused the demon sultan Azathoth to trigger the small sun in Zetar's binary star system to begin consuming the large sun, the majority of Zecor's residents fled to other worlds. Ondina, Serab, and Ondina's longtime friend and caretaker Xegran along with Qweh and his most devoted lackeys were still on the planet when the gamma rays rendered their spaceships useless. 

Ondina had planned all along to take herself, Serab, and Xegran through a gate to "the realm of the Yellow Sun," a peaceful, primitive world many light years away. Qweh demanded that Ondina bring himself and his toadies along as well. When she refused, he beheaded Xegran and brutalized Ondina. Serab was slain when he stepped in to defend his beloved. In spite of his protests, Ondina dispatched his spirit and that of Xegran to the Realm of the Yellow Sun.

Although Qweh and his lackeys were unable to invade the new world, they were not doomed to an inevitable death. Utilizing scientific and mystical abilities taught to him by the powerful High Priestess Yadira, Qweh caused the astral bodies of himself and his companions to form a community of pure energy; for all intents and purposes, a giant, malevolent brain. The hive entity sped away from the doomed world, leaving Ondina to her fate.

The traumatized Ondina believed herself to be at fault for the death of her old friend and her beloved. She tenderly lay each of their bodies in state beside her and spent the next six hours dying with only her regrets for company. She resolved to stay well away from Serab forever so that Qweh would not punish her by harming him in future lifetimes.

The heartbroken Serab never forgot Ondina. In lifetime after lifetime, he attempted to find her, although he forgot the exact nature of his original purpose. 

Serab was reunited with Ondina during his most recent lifetime, although they did not encounter each other in the flesh. He was, for all intents and purposes, part of the spirit world. Although his body still lived, he was no longer able to function properly through it. Gerry was a Fetch, an Irish term essentially describing a ghost which has a body that still lives but through which it is temporarily or permanently unable to interface.
Ondina had reincarnated as Pepper Baiij, a troubled woman with strong mediumistic abilities which she tended to write off as delusion. Pepper knew who Gerry was. Along with his brother, Paul, he was a well-known musician whose work she admired.
Pepper was the only person who could help Gerry, who was being pursued by Yadira Root. This left Gerry in a precarious position. On a good day, Pepper believed strongly in her abilities and in Gerry's affection for her. On a bad day, her self-deprecation caused her to believe that she was merely insane, and/or that Gerry was yet another cad who would use her to get what he wanted and then leave her high and dry.

The story is far from finished, although it has, sadly, had to be back-burnered recently. These story-poems are, I feel, a valid form of keeping it viable.

OctPoWriMo 2018: Day 28: Schism

Copyright Didgeman

Demanding that one

Who has been repeatedly broken

Must make the choice

To appear whole and happy

In order to bridge the chasm

Between rejection and belonging

Only serves to foster

A life built on a lie

The schism remains

And the least misstep

Means falling back into the abyss

~Cie~

OctPoWriMo 2018: Day 27: My Lafayette

I remember you

Your eyes were yellowish-green

You are gone three years

I love you always, Buddy

For you I will always weep 

Mama

OctPoWriMo 2018: Day 26: Mixed Messages

Copyright Pezibear

I need to be more open, I am told

Not to keep my truth a secret, to be bold

Not to be introspective, to reveal

Every thought I think and feeling that I feel

But when I follow this advice, then all I find

Are those who say: don't be quick to speak your mind

You must maintain an air of mystery

Don't be in a hurry to set your secrets free

Have an open heart but don't wear it on your sleeve

Don't let the sun catch you crying, no-one wants to see you grieve

Be real and true and honest, but don't be an open book

Don't keep your light hidden inside, let the world have a look

With all this conflicting information

I just want to catch the train and leave the station

~Cie~

OctPoWriMo 2018: Day 25: Receiver Of

Copyright Geralt

The door does

Not go both ways for me

In the past when the door would open

I would follow the advice of the well-meaning

People who would suggest that I should

Jump in and take the chance

And walk through

The door does

Not go both ways for me

If I go in, part of me does not

Return when I am thrown out the door like the trash

By men who want the old in and out

But they actually hate

Those they use

The door does

Not go both ways for me

Saying I should take a chance on "love"

Is the worst advice that anyone can give me

When I have taken chances, I have 

Only been abused, so

Not again

The door does

Not go both ways for me

I long ago grew very weary

Of giving but never receiving in return

Only receiving abuse for love

Do not suggest that I

Try again

~Cie~

Notes:

The Triquain, created by Shelley A. Cephas, is a poem with several creative variances and can be a rhyming or non-rhyming verse. The simplest form is a poem made up of 7 lines with 3, 6, 9, 12, 9, 6, and 3 syllables in this order. 

Yes, the poem is autobiographical. Please, please, please do not suggest that there is something "wrong" with me for not wanting to be involved in a romantic relationship. Please do not suggest that I need to "fix" myself so that I can "find love." That may be something you need or want. It is not something that I do. I have had more than enough of gaslighting by narcissistic predators posing as "nice guys" for one lifetime, thank you anyway.