Monday, April 18, 2016

Judgment


Their judgmental ways
 Taught me to be tolerant
 Or at least to try

~Cie~

Prompts Abused:
(Flip the mask around and upside and down and try talking of the gods the other way.) 

(Think back to your childhood)

Notes:
I grew up in a very judgmental, religiously dogmatic family. My father's family were old world Catholics. My mother's were hard-line Baptists. These judgmental attitudes eventually pushed me away from the church. I didn't want to be that way.
Flipping the issue on its head, a portion of my trifecta of mental illness is borderline personality disorder. People with borderline personality disorder tend to see everything in shades of black and white. I have to fight against this all the time. I tend to take things very personally, to become very defensive, to feel that I am always being attacked or rejected. It makes it very hard to be close to people. I also tend to push people away before they have a chance to hurt me. It is an extremely lonely disorder to live with.
The upshot is, I can't blame my family for the portion of the problem that is mine to bear alone. I have been guilty of being terribly judgmental, and I have hurt people with my judgments.

11 comments:

  1. Your note after captured me...I can see why it would push you away. This poem definitely addresses a new perspective. Well done.

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  2. Sometimes the gods' bad example is better than their good. Seems like is has been so for you. Keep up the good work!

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  3. The trying is the road to achieving. Being tolerant is one of the hard ones,,because we see the the opposite wherever we look,,,fake it 'til you make it, and surprising you will find you have achieved your goal.

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  4. Hurt people hurt people, as the saying goes. I think this shows incredible strength and self-awareness.

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  5. This is already a great piece, and then your note after adds such poignant insight. I love the visual you've chosen, too, and want to claim it for my own sign.

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  6. Its certainly heartening to see someone willing to not make the same mistakes which cause them suffering and to instead reach out in understanding and empathy.

    Much love...

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  7. Oh my..I had my moment of reality when I realized I was a member of the judgmental. I walked away and I finally found my freedom to love.

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  8. I hear you about bring raised in a religious view so narrow it scared me away....I love your line about their judgment taught you to be tolerant. Awesome!

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  9. I have family and people with whom I work that are at least BPD, if not outright sociopaths... You appear to channel your condition with much more positive intentions - and results. And that 17 year old? She'd be proud of you ~

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    Replies
    1. Borderline personality disorder isn't sociopathology. Sociopaths tend to believe that nothing they do is wrong. They can mimic emotions, but they lack empathy. People with borderline personality disorder do not lack empathy. We are overly emotional and our emotions can cause havoc.
      Sociopaths tend to victimize others. People with borderline personality disorder tend to become victims because we want so badly to be cared for.
      I do want to state that unlike the general public believes, most sociopaths do not go on murderous rampages. It can be hard to know a person is a sociopath until you have known them for a long time.

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  10. What an intriguing poem and following note. Turning a negative into a positive is a sign of spiritual strength.

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