Wednesday, October 25, 2017

Cie Vs. Dementia

100% of proceeds go to the Alzheimer's Association

All right, people, time to get real. I know I'm not popular or pretty or any of that other krap that people are supposed to be, but this isn't about me. I designed this shirt, and for the next four days, all proceeds will go to the Alzheimer's Association. Even if you don't like me that much, I think we can all agree that dementia is even worse than I am. So, buy something interesting and help the Alzheimer's Association fight this lousy disease.

~The Real Cie~

The Cheese Grates It + OctPoWriMo 2017: Day 25: Don't Buy the Bullshit

This image was found in multiple places and I am unable to determine its origin.
If anyone knows the origin of the image, I will be glad to properly credit its creator.

Don't Buy the Bullshit

Nobody
Has the right
To make you feel
Bad about your body

Never apologize
To anybody
For your body

Those busybodies
Who think it's okay
To belittle others' bodies
Need to take a long walk
Off a short pier
Into shark-infested waters
With raw steaks
Tied to their bodies

The Cheese
No Longer Apologizing for My Body

Note:
I am not officially participating in today's OctPoWriMo prompt, although I did create a poem in spite of the fact that I initially wasn't going to because die-t talk is such a turn-off for me. However, I have to keep in mind that many people haven't been lucky enough to find Size Acceptance and Health At Every Size as I did. This is why I share here my response to this prompt.
If I hadn't found size acceptance and health at every size at age 45 (seven years ago now) I would be 52 and still hating myself and calling myself horrific names like "fat pig" and "disgusting land whale." Thanks to my myriad of endocrine problems plus DNA (my mother's side of the family tends to be heavy, and to have endocrine problems) I will never be thin unless I develop a deadly disease such as acute myelogenous leukemia as my great-grandmother did. She went from 300 pounds to 95 in the space of a year, and then the disease killed her.
It isn't being a "foodie" that determines a person's body type. The multi-billion dollar die-t industry has doctors and the FDA in its pocket. Most so-called diseases of obesity are actually diseases which become more likely with aging in people of all sizes. 
I worked with the elderly for close to 25 years. There are elderly people of all sizes. The idea that there are no fat old people is a fallacy. Fat old people are no less healthy than old people of other sizes. In fact, many of the fat older folk that I worked with were reasonably healthy. There was one portly gent in his nineties who was a diabetic and still taking care of himself. I worked night shift and only heard from him on one occasion: when he hurt his hand.
Nobody needs to apologize to anyone for their body type. It's really not something we can help and trying to change it tends to result in temporary weight loss with more weight ensuing. Dieting is horrible for the metabolism. 
I am not the best person to explain the science behind this. I recommend these blogs:
Ragen Chastain, the blogger behind Dances With Fat, is a competitive dancer who participates in marathons. She is five foot four inches tall and weighs 280 pounds. 
For my own part, I sometimes can't afford more than one meal a day and I work a very physical job. Still fat. However, unlike in the past, I don't give myself added stress by hating myself for my weight.
I hope you'll consider my thoughts. Too many people hurt themselves hating the bodies we were given to live in. There's nothing wrong with your body or your love for good food.

Here are some bodies that people have been shamed for having.

Too short and skinny to be "manly"
In good health for someone in his age range

Too short and skinny to be "manly"
Terminally ill/multiple health issues

Too fat to be "attractive."
In good health for someone in his age range

Too short and skinny to be "manly"
Died from stomach cancer at age 67

Too fat to be "attractive"
Shot to death at age 24

Too short and skinny to be "manly"
In good health for someone in his age range

Too fat to be "attractive"
In good health and putting up with no bullshit from haters

Dare you speak ill of the Queen of Soul?

I wish there had been a Beth Ditto around when I was younger
Maybe I wouldn't have abused my body with years of dieting and myself with years of hate for "failing" at dieting

When I opened this photo of Adele, one of the first suggested searches that came up was "flattering hairstyles for overweight women."
May I just say, fuck that shit.
Fuck "flattering," and over what weight?
The B in BMI stands for Bullshit.
The BMI is an actuarial tool. It was never meant to be used as a measure of health.
We need to stop conflating our worth with a number on a scale.

~The Cheese Hath Grated It~



OctPoWriMo 2017: Day 24: Want to Love


 At the Beginning of the End
Photoshop Manipulation by The Real Cie

Want to Love:
A Poem for Gerry by Pepper

Want to love
Want you now
Now or never
Now is the time
Time for us
Time for love
Love is pain
Love is fear
Fear of abandonment
Fear of betrayal
Betrayal of trust
Betrayal of hope
Hope you won't hurt me
Hope I won't hurt you
You are the one
You could be the last
Last always and forever
Last chance I'll take
Take me away
Take me along
Along for the ride
Along by your side
Side with me now
Side of the road
Road leading to nowhere
Road leading home
Home in your arms
Home in your heart
Heart made of glass
Heart hardened by hurt
Hurt again and again
Hurt too badly to heal
Heal my broken heart
Heal my angry soul
Soul call from you
Soul weary and sad
Sad is the song
Sad is this life
Life all gone wrong
Life at an end
End of the road
End of the world
World is in shreds
World in trouble
Trouble within
Trouble without
Without love
Without you
Love
You

by
Pepper Baiij
for
Gerry Clifford

And by Cie for Gem

Fetch is an original WIP novel by Team Netherworld


Shining Star
Photoshop Manipulation by The Real Cie


Monday, October 23, 2017

OctPoWriMo 2017: Day 23: Angel and Devil: Supernatural Version




OctPoWriMo 2017: Day 23:
Angel and Devil:
Version II:
The Supernatural Version

The brothers should be adversaries
Instead, they are the best of friends
The elder is celestial
The younger, infernal
They work together
Help each other
Two parts of
One soul
Love

~Cie~

Notes:
My SPN friends know that I ship Sam and Dean as an OTP. I kept this poem ambiguous. It works for either an OTP or BROTP pairing of the guys. I hope you like it!

OctPoWriMo 2017: Day 23: Angel and Devil: The Fetch Version

Image Source Unknown.

Angel and Devil Brothers:
Version I:
The Fetch Version

The brothers should be adversaries
Instead, they are the best of friends
The elder is celestial
The younger, infernal
They work together
Help each other
Two parts of
One soul
Love

~Cie~

Notes:
I do not know the source for the image I used.
I used Google Image Search and still could not find the origin
If anyone knows it, I will be glad to credit them
Otherwise, I guess they can sue me
I have a crappy mobile home with no working furnace or shower and a mold problem, or I have a beat-up 1998 Subaru Forester.
Neither is worth much, take your pick.
I hate art thieves. I would never use anyone's work and claim it as my own. 
However, I am an adult, and sometimes I get tired of being lectured about being an errant shitbag if I can't give super duper ultra proper credit on every picture I use to illustrate a poem or story which is never going to earn me a dime but which I feel properly illustrates the work. Keep in mind, I write because I can't draw. Unless you're wanting a pre-school level story illustrated with stick figures. That I can do.
I am making zero profit off my writing. Quite the opposite, in fact. I could go to my place of employment and pick up more hours during the time that I'm wasting on writing. Most of the time I don't even get any comments. I hardly think I'm any kind of threat to anyone's livelihood. 
I tried to find pictures of angel and devil brothers. I found a lot of cute cartoons. I chose one of a chubby cartoon angel and devil couple to use in a forthcoming project.
I also found a lot of sexy, scantily clad, young, conventionally attractive white women and a lot of hunky, scantily clad, young, conventionally attractive white men. This is not what I was looking for.
The poem is both explanatory and illustrative of the dynamic between Gerry and Paul Clifford, the brothers who are central to Team Netherworld's work in progress, probably never to be entirely completed novel, Fetch.
Gerry and Paul's basic physical appearances, personalities, and the dynamic between them were inspired by real-life brothers Angus and Malcolm Young. Beyond this, Gerry and Paul developed into their own beings. They are not clones of the Young brothers.
In other words, hunky young studly angel and devil dudes would not be an accurate illustration of Gerry and Paul, who are diminutive older men and were never considered conventionally attractive. 
As well, although Angus has a tendency to wear less and less clothing as a performance goes on, he doesn't have the chiseled abs of a male stripper, nor does he get his rather hairy chest waxed. 
Malcolm generally wore tank tops and he did have muscular arms from many years of playing the guitar, but he was still tiny in stature and did not fit the Sexy Male Stripper Angel image.
Paul doesn't wear a schoolboy uniform. He opts instead for a conventional business suit, and by the end of a show, he is down to a Speedo.
I have a nice photo of Angus and Malcolm Young which I considered using but figured I'd be written off as "fangirling," so I chose the image at the top instead. Which I couldn't find the source for. So I'm, you know, evil and a crappy person and all.
Speaking of art thieves, my dear friend Kamidiox is a talented artist from Mexico City. Art thieves stole much of her Supernatural-related fan art and tried to pass it off as their own, selling it on t-shirts and cups via Teespring. This caused no end of trouble for Kami, bringing undue stress into her life and wasting her time. I can't abide people who would do such a thing. I think them to be the worst of losers. 


Kami made the above image for me. She even managed to make me look cute (no small feat that!) while remaining true to my appearance. (Hint: I'm not young or thin, and you'll never see me posing as an angel or devil hottie.) 
I'm thinking about having the guys made into tattoos, one for each arm.
If you would like to commission Kami's talents for an idea of your own, she can be found at kamidiox.tumblr.com
In any case, I do not claim the picture I used to be my own work, I am making no money from this, and I'll gladly credit the creator of the image if I can find them. It's possible that I purchased the image from 123rf and didn't file it properly, but I wasn't able to find it there.
Fetch borrows from various mythologies, particularly the Cthulhu Mythos, but also including elements from more modern works, such as Supernatural. Bonded platonic soul mate pairs follow the example of Dean and Sam Winchester, where Dean is the vessel for the celestial element (Michael) and Sam is the vessel for the infernal element (Lucifer). 
However, in the mythology of Fetch, instead of being vessels, the characters are entities embodying celestial and infernal elements. Gerry is the celestial element, Paul the infernal. Pepper (the troubled medium assisting the brothers) is the celestial partner in a platonic soul mate bond with her infernal brother Carrington. 
I am also creating a Supernatural version of this poem just for my friends in the fandom. I suppose that's fangirling. Oh well.

~The Cheese Hath Grated It~





OctPoWriMo 2017: Day 22: Empty Road


Empty Road

Passion
Ain't gonna happen
Bliss
What is this?
On a journey without a compass
Or too many compasses
And clocks
Depending on one's perspective
The long and winding road
Is a crooked path
Rolling on
To the bitter end
I'm ready for nothing

~Cie~


Note:
I'm afraid the idea of "following my bliss" seems absolutely ludicrous to me. 
When I'm unsure if I'll have adequate food for the week or if my body will allow me to keep working or if my car will keep working so I can do my job or if the space heaters will be enough to handle another winter in my home where I don't have a working furnace or shower and I know the pipes are going to freeze like they do every year, the concept of "bliss" seems a lot like buying outlandishly expensive champagne when I don't even like champagne.
Fuck "bliss." I'll settle for simply not being worked into the ground and having nothing to show for it.

Saturday, October 21, 2017

OctPoWriMo 2017: Day 21: Nothing Remains the Same



Nothing Remains the Same

Adapt to everything, no matter how awful
Because that's the only way to achieve balance
Comfort zone equals complacency
Dreams do not equal destiny
Everything ends
Fate cannot be fought
Good things come to those with goals
However, life does not always end happily
Insistence on an outcome is idiocy
Just go where the flow takes your jetty
Kill your darlings kindly
Let yourself not be lulled
Mediocrity has no merit
Nostalgia is neediness
Ownership is oblivion
Precious dreams are predators
Quiet hopes quelled
Reduced to ash by reality
Stagnation is seductive
To those who fear transformation
Unhappy are those unyielding
Vying for the desired outcome is vanity
Wishing to avoid change is weak
Xenophobic
Yearning for yesterday
Zaps today's zeal

~Cie~


Note:
I honestly think some of the ideas we are taught about living for today are quite lacking in empathy for those grieving a loss. This poem is cold and harsh, not encouraging in any way.