Showing posts with label Nervous Norvis Cafe. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Nervous Norvis Cafe. Show all posts

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Nervous Norvis' Café


Ode to Nervous Norvis' Café
by
Trent Lane

Nervous Norvis has excellent taste
In coffee at his little place
Norvis’ caffeinated café
Will blow you away
Like a rocket heading for space

~Trent Lane~


S’up, Netherworld Caffeine addicts? I wanted to write this epic limerick to tell you about my boss, Nervous Norvis, ‘cause he’s totally rad.
Norvis is a thoroughly modern mummy. His pyramid sits right behind his café, cutting down on commute time. His backyard is just a few steps away, so he can take a quick break to tend to his little dog Pharaoh if the need arises.
Norvis sells only fair trade coffee, so you can feel good about catching your A.M. buzz. Or P.M. Whatever.
For unfortunate souls like The Cheesemeister who can’t drink caffeine, Norvis also has decaf. It doesn’t taste like frog piss, the way a lot of decaf does. Not that I actually, like, know what frog piss tastes like or anything. I just figure it probably tastes a lot like decaf coffee, you know.
So, like, what I’m saying is that even though work is a four letter word and stuff, working with Norvis actually doesn’t seem like work, so I don’t mind doing it. So come on down and let me make you a latte sometime. Or an espresso. Whatever.
Trent Lane
For
Encyclopedia Netherworld
A division of FOGNL/UNDEAD Media Services
And
Miskatonic University Netherworld

Cross-Posted to:

Your rad reporter, working out a melody for my cool new lyrics


Friday, December 6, 2013

Alfred Noyes: The Highwayman



Alfred Noyes stopped by Nervous Norvis' café last night to have a cup of tea and recite his famous poem, The Highwayman for the crowd.
Beavis and Butthead showed their support for Noyes' work. Butthead stated "and then, my friend, you die," followed by Beavis' enthusiastic assertion of "you die!"



Noyes invited the fellows to join him for tea, but Beavis said they'd prefer a Crappuccino. They enjoyed reciting poetry until the next morning when the caffeine finally wore off.

Tom Thumb
for
FOGNL/UNDEAD Arts and Culture Beat

Lillie McFerrin Writes