Cheeky History with
Ornery Owl
Sympathy for
Narcissus:
A Limerick Haibun
Fusion Sandwich
Tongue in Cheek Style
Narcissus got a bad rap
For being a stuck-up chap
He wasn’t malicious
Though he thought himself delicious
The poor guy was caught in a trap
There are variations on the myth of
Narcissus, but the core story is as follows.
Narcissus was the son of the river
god Cephissus and the nymph Liriope. When Narcissus was young, a seer named
Tiresias told Liriope that Narcissus would live a long life as long as he never
knew himself.
Narcissus grew up to be very
handsome and had many admirers, but he was not interested in any of them. One
day, after hunting, Narcissus lay beside a still pool of water. When he saw his
own reflection, he fell deeply in love with himself. He tried to touch the
figure in the water but could not. He was so enamored with his reflection that
he would not leave the water's edge.
Fixating on his reflection to the
exclusion of all else, Narcissus eventually succumbed to exhaustion and starvation.
When the nymphs came to bury him, his body transformed into a beautiful white
daffodil flower thereafter known as the Narcissus.
There are several variations on the
Narcissus myth. The best-known variation was Metamorphoses, an epic poem
written by Ovid. Metamorphoses explains the creation of various plants, animals,
and natural phenomena through stories of transformation.
In Ovid’s poem, the nymph, Echo, told
a story that was so long that Juno missed an opportunity to catch Jove while he
flirted with the nymphs. Juno was angry with Echo, so she cursed the nymph to only
repeat the words of others thenceforth.
One day in the woods, Echo saw
Narcissus. She was captivated by his beauty and followed him. When Narcissus
asked, "who is here?" Echo could only answer "here!"
Echo tried to embrace Narcissus, but
he spurned her. Narcissus's rejection caused Echo to waste away until only her
voice remained.
Narcissus stopped to rest by a clear
pool of water, in which he beheld his reflection and was enchanted by its
beauty. He sat staring at his reflection day and night, neither eating nor
sleeping, eventually perishing from exhaustion and starvation. When the nymphs
buried him, he transformed into a beautiful Narcissus flower.
In Pausanias' version of the story,
Narcissus had a twin sister who looked exactly like him. He loved her very
much. When she died, Narcissus found solace in looking at his reflection in the
pond. This version of Narcissus does not fall in love with himself; instead, his
reflection allows him to remember his sister.
The ancient Greek mythographer
Konon's dark, homoerotic version of the myth of Narcissus takes place in the
Greek city of Thespeia. In Konon's version, Narcissus scorns even Eros, the god
of love himself.
A man named Ameinias falls deeply in
love with Narcissus, but Narcissus spurns Ameinias and sends him a sword.
Overcome with sorrow, Ameinias asks Eros to avenge him and commits suicide using
the sword that Narcissus sent him.
Later, Narcissus falls in love with
his own reflection in a pool of water. He becomes distraught because he is
unable to touch the beautiful man that he sees in the pool. Eventually,
Narcissus ends his own life, transforming into the lovely flower that now bears
his name.
Free use image by John Hain on Pixabay
While the third version of Narcissus
is arrogant and spiteful, the best-known version is self-absorbed but not
malevolent. I feel that a more apt comparison than Narcissus for individuals
such as Donald tRump is the infamous failed emperor Commodus, whose focus on
his own glory touched off the downfall of Rome.
Commodus was the son of the highly
regarded emperor Marcus Aurelius. After the death of his father, Commodus became
increasingly dictatorial. Rather than acting as a leader, he focused on building
a cult of personality by performing as a gladiator in rigged matches where he
always came out the winner. He was assassinated in his bath on 31 December 192
by his personal trainer, a wrestler named Narcissus.
Roman statesman Dio Cassius
described the reign of Commodus as marking the descent "from a kingdom of
gold to one of iron and rust". When Donald tRump took office, he attempted
to upend any programs created during the Obama era while building his cult of
personality through continual campaigning.
Members of the Roman senate despised
and feared Commodus, but his cult of personality thrived thanks to his
showboating. Commodus was a megalomaniac, describing himself as having godlike
prowess. Donald tRump described himself as “the chosen one” and a “very stable
genius.”
Early in 192, Commodus, declared
himself the new Romulus, renaming the city Colonia Lucia Annia Commodiana. All
the months of the year were renamed to correspond with his twelve names:
Lucius, Aelius, Aurelius, Commodus, Augustus, Herculeus, Romanus,
Exsuperatorius, Amazonius, Invictus, Felix, and Pius. The legions were renamed
Commodianae, the fleet which imported grain from Africa was termed Alexandria
Commodiana Togata, the Senate was called the Commodian Fortunate Senate, his palace,
and the Roman people themselves were given the name Commodianus, and the day on
which these reforms were decreed was called Dies Commodianus.
Donald tRump jokingly said that he
should be made pResident for life. Only he wasn’t joking.
In conclusion, while Narcissus may
have been self-absorbed to his own detriment and the detriment of those who
became enamored with him, his conceit did not have negative effects on an
entire civilization. The conceit of Emperor Commodus was the beginning of the
end for the Roman Empire. Commodus did not care about the Roman people, he
cared about his own glory.
Therefore, I submit that the term
narcissism is incorrectly applied to individuals such as Donald tRump. I
believe that such megalomaniacs should be called Commodes to reflect the
historical figure whose actions they mirror. Like them, commodes tend to be full
of crap.
I said I wouldn't do this again, but I'm giving it one more shot.
If you are capable of doing a proper critique rather than a tear-down, have at it. I'm not heavily invested in this piece. I wrote it as a lark.
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